Fallen world

Why does the bible make sense.
When I started living as selfsupporting as possible my great dream was to live in harmony with nature.
Needing to till the earth I caused death to the earthworms, needing food I needed to kill slugs and larvea. As I believed all live was equall and thus eating plants causes plant death and eating animals causes animal death than just needing to eat I caused death in all living around me.
So how can this be good?
When a perfectly healthy sheep had two lam and could not deliver them and we needed to slaughter her to save the lams I was thus disgusted about live in its core that I got angry with live itself. And God in particular.
It was then that I happened to come across a site teaching creationscience.
It taught me evolution is not a fact but a paradigma,  it was possible this world is created good and became spoiled.
And so I found this answer that made sense. The world is fallen, and because of the fall of man we live separated from God and thus in a world where death reigns. This dying is not good and of course my feeling all this death is not good was sound.
Now I believe in the victorious Christ who leads oss to God and in Him we are saved to be with Him when death will have no dominion.

I no longer meditate to find my higher self, nor do I seek to become a better me, I meditate to praise God, I pray to be guided by God and feel comforted that Christ won over death and was raised from the death so that now we can die in Him and He can come and live in oss.
The book the normal christians live from Watchman Nee gave me understanding of the great sacrifice and gift the Lord Jesus offers.
This has turned my darkness into light


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